Never Say Goodbye

I have been sitting here for a good 30 minutes trying to figure out the best way to write this post. It is something that is not easily said but something that I want to say to help others get through this the best way possible.

I can't sit here and say a deployment is hard. This is obvious. What I can sit here and say is how I got through them. What I did that helped and made them bearable. Because let's face it, all we can do is make them bearable. These are things that I did to help me get through the deployments and they won't work for everyone but they did help me.

1-Don't watch the news- I learned this the second deployment. The media has a nasty way of stretching the truth. Not only that but you will know before anyone else if something has happened or is happening. If I saw something on the internet about things going on over yonder, I would close out and think as many happy thoughts as I could. If someone called me telling me to look at the news, had I heard anything, is everything ok, I would simply say "yes" and then patiently, ok not patiently, but I would keep myself busy until I heard from him letting me know that everything was ok. DO NOT WATCH THE NEWS!

2-Do what's best for your relationship-My husband was worried about me, and when I say worried about me, I mean he worried about everything.  We came to an agreement that I would move home to be closer to our family. I didn't have friends in the area at the time and nothing holding me to where we lived so I was more than willing, especially with our first baby on the way. It was what worked for us and I was happy to do anything that would make him worry about me a little less.

3-Always have your phone on you-As a military spouse, you learn really quick that as soon as you don't have your phone on you, they will call. If you work, try to make arrangements with your soldier and with your boss about phone calls.

4-No you are not superman/superwoman-You can cry, you can get emotional. Everyone always thinks of our soldiers as the brave ones and they are AMAZINGLY BRAVE but so are we. So are the spouses and family that they leave behind for that time they are gone. We have to be strong for everyone and sometimes we think that we have to be superman/woman and never show that emotion. I tried not to and I made sure people knew that I didn't want to talk about it unless I brought it up. Don't be afraid to talk about what you are going through but also don't feel that you have to.

5-Stop Fighting- The month before your loved one leaves is probably the hardest. So much has to be done and everyone is stressed and emotional. Do what you can not to fight. I know it sounds hard and it is hard. But those days are precious and you don't want to spend them fighting. Talk as much as possible about what you are feeling and going through and stick together through it all.

6-NEVER SAY GOODBYE-The hubs and I never say goodbye. Saying goodbye seemed too final when going through that situation. Say anything or say nothing but NEVER SAY GOODBYE!